The 13th That Left Me Emotional

It is one of those days. Where the past meets reality, somberness and melancholy takes the lions share. I can’t fathom why things happen the way they do but it is an eye opener. Right here the ground I stand on is filled with nostalgia, pessimism and maybe I need to be inebriated.

That could wipe away my silent tears. Had never realized that suffering a loss leaves a permanent mark. We are taught to be strong but we seem not to find the needed closure.

13th August happens to be a day that leaves me with chills and negative thoughts cloud my brain, I can’t cry because how will they see me? A grown man sobbing as if he is the first to suffer such a tragedy? Well we are always told that God has his own reasons, I am yet to find that reason but I guess it will just remain rhetoric.

Mama would be 49 years today. Memories of what transpired 11 years ago are still vivid. You had to rest and I only hope you are watching over me. The years have not been smooth without you.

Last year was the worst because I even contemplated suicide that maybe I could join you. Was fed of the suffering, bad luck, every problem coming after me like a magnet.

Came to terms with my own predicaments and I am now appreciating myself more mum.

Mama would be making 49 years today. Memories are still nostalgic. Continue resting in peace mummy. Sadly I didn’t give you your flowers when you were still alive. They had to appear in form of a wreath with words like Rest In Peace. Oh how excruciating 😖

Your only son is now grown up, will also become a dad someday. Your grand kids will know how powerful you were.

I could scribble down chapters and verses but that won’t take my pain away.

Happy birthday and rest in paradise always. Regards to dad too.